A measure of then and now.....

With respect to my Owner,

Take a look at these 2 photos. The one on the left was taken when I first joined SL and stumbled upon the place I like to call my home from home....Dark Den's Glint. The one on the right is a photo taken this morning at home...I think it's fair to say I have changed quite a bit and not just in looks....I have grown....I have adapted....I have found myself and I am happy!

signed his submissive owned 

Christmas Morning

With respect to my Owner,

To everyone I know Merry Christmas! - I hope you all have a wonderful day!

To my Owner....Merry Christmas love

signed his submissive owned

Christmas Wishes

With respect to my Owner,

I overheard a conversation today between a father and his young daughter...they were discussing Christmas and of course being as she was a child I was taken by surprise when she said to her Father a conversation that went something like this.....

Daughter - "Dad every-one at Christmas gets to give and receive presents don't they?"
Dad - "Yes it's a tradition"
Daughter - "Just a present?"
Dad - "Not just a present it's about showing the ones you love like family and friends that you care and some just make wishes"
Daughter - "Wishes" after a pause she continued "If you make a wish does Father Christmas make them come true?"
Dad - "Well depends what it is but if you have been good all year and the wish is for another's benefit then he will try. Why do you ask?"
Daughter - "Can I make a wish for you Dad because I have been a good girl"
Dad - through laughter "well I am not sure you have been completely good this year but it can't hurt to try"
Daughter - "I wish Father Christmas would bring Mummy back because you have been so sad since she went to be an angel"

I can tell you there was suddenly silence in the shop....we all looked at them and her Father gulped lost for words....she carried on
Daughter - "When he does I would like a cuddle from her too because I miss her"

Now right at that moment you could have heard a pin drop her Father was clearly moved and before he could reply she said
Daughter - "Of course if I haven't been good enough this year for him to do that I will be extra good next year"

What do you say to that? Well let me tell you what happened next....her Father was close to tears and I was closet to them how could I not step in and take the pressure off a little so I reached out to them both

Me - "What a beautiful wish and I am sure that Father Christmas hears that wish but you know not all wishes can be granted and it's nothing to do with if your good or not remember Father Christmas is only one man and has to deliver all the presents and wishes of the entire world in one night sometimes he can't deliver them all but knowing that you made the wish is more special than actually receiving it and that makes you a very good girl indeed" I paused and winking to her father I simply said "if Father Christmas can't deliver the wish but agrees that you have been good I am sure that he will leave you an extra present as a reward and thank you on Christmas Morning"

She looked at her father and with tears in his eyes he nodded in agreement as the woman behind the counter handed the girl a couple of sweets to distract her and me I was given the biggest hug and thanked by the man for stepping in when he struggled to find words....and that got me thinking....

We can't all have what we want at Christmas...family members who have passed away...love ones who may be to far away from us through choice or circumstance....money may be too tight....close friends may not be as close as we would like them to be....so this Christmas follow her example and make a wish if all the world did that it would be a much better place

signed his submissive owned

Submission - my thoughts part 2

With respect to my Owner,

So it happens that when I put pen to paper a couple of weeks back and poured my heart out that every word I said really was spot on.

Submission comes from the heart....when 2 people love each other...2 people who are cut from the same cloth....2 halves of the same circle who join together as we have they act like keys and unlock parts of each other that others could never reach....Submission is about who we are as individuals and together as a couple...the 'Vanilla' part or our relationship is the baseline....the rest has been built on a sturdy foundation...there is no right or wrong regardless of what people may say or think it's what feels right for us as a couple.

Submission and the lifestyle it creates within a couple in the form of D/s or M/s (or in our case O/o) is what makes our relationship tick and completes us....its what gives us the inner strength and the feeling of peace that allows us to be together even when we are apart

Today I spoke with  Jennys Willful (from Darkside Clubhouse BDSM Academy) and she helped me to gather my thoughts...to make sense of my feelings she made me see that I already had the tools in front of me that what I was thinking was correct that I am already in the lifestyle that I crave and my Owner is the key...together with him we are what makes this work....he and I as a partnership as lovers as friends and now as my Owner as he encourages me to seek the comfort and joy I receive from this while he is by my side and I am by his

So much of SL can distort what the Submissive lifestyle is about and yet here my Owner and I are living proof that not everyone just plays at the lifestyle in SL...it can work no matter how hard it may be with the distance at times and more than that what we have is the most beautiful and natural thing in the world!

Finally thank you Jenny....you have allowed me to feel free...you have helped me to see that I am normal....that I am right to feel that the relationship I have with my Owner is something that is rare to many but understood by those who understand the world in which we live as a couple...as you said yourself 'Submission is ONLY what it means to you' and that one sentence sums it up for me!

Here is a link to Jenny's Blog please take the time to read it jennyswallows.blogspot.com

So to my Owner....I know what is is that makes me tick I know what it is that I want and that is you and what we have now and always

signed his submissive owned

An apology....

With respect to my Owner,

Life has a habit of sneaking up on you and biting you hard and square on the backside....I have tried to write in my blog for over a week started some and stopped again....both my Owner and I had to deal with an issue and then I had other RL issues to deal with but finally I have come out the other side of it and am smiling and able to write again....it's been like writer's block....laughs...so let me say I am very sorry and will now pick up the pace once more and stop being slack

Now I am back on top of things and feeling more like myself and I have a few new projects in the pipeline....grins....I am sure in time people will learn of them but for now I am playing the cards very close to my chest!

Oh and to my Owner who has been my rock and my soundboard as I have poured out my frustrations and bent his ear for hours at a time...Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

signed his submissive owned

Hard day!

With respect to my Owner,

Some days everything seems just like a struggle...today has been one of those days...couldn't sleep properly...woke up several times...got up early well early...had a bad day at work....had problems logging into SL and yet through all this I was able to smile because the best bit of my day has been the contact I have had from my Owner who just makes me glow from top to toe...so for now there really is nothing to report I just need to have a better day tomorrow!

signed his submissive owned

A lesson for us all!

With respect to my Owner,

You know I learnt a valuable lesson once, taught to me by someone who hurt me real bad long before I ever joined SL.....

'Sometimes it is human natures way to read between the lines....if you write or say something that is vague it is open to interpretation that means that sometimes it is better to stay quiet and say nothing at all rather than say something that could come back to bite you on the arse or hurt others'

After reading another persons blog I read between the lines, rightly or wrongly, shared my concerns on the subject and voiced my own opinion to something that I felt was a personal attack on my Owner and I, in defence I wrote a rather long and in depth post which I have now toned down to what your reading as I have now cooled down some what over the subject.

I still believe that the post concerned by the other person was written very vaguely indeed although others may disagree with my opinion on that!

signed his submissive owned

Spending Time with my sister Tara in Melita

With respect to my Owner,

So tonight I left the kids with a babysitter and even though I wasn't sure about leaving our newest member less than 24 hours after his birth I felt it would be good for me to get out and about...so I decided to grab a boat from our pier outside to Melita and head to see my Sister Tara.

On arrival at Melita she was talking with other residents on the Island Rholes and Ana who she introduced me to before we got into our usual sibling rivalry talk and the name calling started...ever since she became a Slaver on the island her tough streak has become more and more obvious...still I did manage to give as good as I got and after a while we headed to the tavern for a drink before moving on to her place to discuss clothes make-up hair and our partners

Finally not long before the boat came back to pick me up to whisk me home once more to my Owner and children we sat on the beach and chatted just as 2 loving sisters would do discussing the world and remembering fond and not so fond memories....all to soon the call of home was to strong and I headed home blowing kisses to Tara and sending my love to her Pry and their children as she sent her love to Odin and our family

I do so enjoy times like this when we get together and have girlie talk after a cat fight of words!

Submission - my thoughts

With respect to my Owner,

Wikipedia definition of 'Submission' - the act or state of deference or acquiescence to a stronger power. It may refer to:

• Submission (emotion)

Submission to me means more than just emotions it's giving myself entirely to one person....creating unique unbreakable bonds....trusting the other person 100%....putting love, honestly, respect and trust above all other emotions....surrendering to that person the one that controls and commands you without fear or hesitation in any and every situation that you come across together or apart.

See my life has changed a lot....from the day I met my Owner this need to submit has been in the background eating away at me slowly until finally I realised that it is a desire and need that I must fulfil. As we have become closer he has watched how I give myself to him and has grown to love how this act makes him feel. Many a time have my Owner and I discussed our desires and this particular one of late has been the one that keeps coming up. It has become stronger with each passing day and I have been trying to understand it and gain insight into it. On my quest to do so I have spoken to a few people on their understanding of submission and tried to understand what it is that makes me tick...what it is that makes me submit to my man in the way that I do and I have come to the conclusion that it is partly because of the following:

I am not a religious person as such, some weeks I attend church and gives thanks, (maybe I don't do it often enough), if and when I feel the need to do so, (I figure he upstairs and I have an understanding...he can see what I do on a daily basis and if he was unhappy I am sure he could tell me...why travel to his house each week to give thanks when you can thank him anywhere?), however that aside one thing has struck me and your either see it my way or not (I am not here to force my opinion on you) we all know how according to religion the world was made and how all people evolved from Adam and Eve some say that Adam was the one in charge as he was created first and ultimately Man is the more dominant life form and others say that Eve and Women are more dominant as she was made after him from his rib as a correction to what God had done wrong when he created Adam....personally I have no opinion on this I find the whole story hard to swallow but I do know one thing that slowly I am learning that as a woman I still hold men as the stronger sex in my life regardless of my beliefs.

Don't get me wrong I am not weak I am a strong willed person, I have always believed in equality of women and my job role means that I do actually work in a male orientated environment (I am the only woman in the company I work for) however with that it does mean that I have to ooze control and take command over various situations all day everyday in my work life. Outside of work I crave the control of some-one else to give me a break from having to decide everything. I want to know and feel that some-one else is looking out for my best interests on a daily basis. I want to follow the command of another to shelter me from the worlds demands that I have to deal with everyday...I need direction, love, honesty, protection, trust and satisfaction.

This is where Submission comes in....with my Owner controlling over me, commanding me and loving me as he does I am able to surrender myself to him and let him guide and protect me. There is a certain amount of comfort that comes from knowing that he is there whenever I need him. With him in control I feel the security of our relationship wrap around us like a security blanket....it makes me tingle in delight and smile....his collar around my neck means that he is close at all times no matter the distance and when situations overwhelm me it is there to remind me that he will guide me and offer me the support that I need.

He spotted this need in me long before I knew it existed or at least recognised it....slowly he and I have built up this Owner/owned relationship and he is now taking more control of me and is starting to test my limits in response to my submission as our relationship deepens and this part of us now becomes the major force behind us as a couple. Yes we love each other just as all couples do and have a 'Vanilla' relationship that forms the basis of us as a couple, I support him in everything he does not just regarding me but in life in general and when needed give my opinion, I am hear to listen to him to love him, to be his partner and around those that would not agree with or understand our Owner/owned relationship we behave just as any couple would but together with others of like minds and behind closed doors we both have a need to submit and control each other in our perspective roles. We are both aware that this need and desire will only increase over time and are both fully prepared to do so.

So for me Submission is all about the 2 of us, its me putting my life in the hands of another, it is me finding my place in the world, confirming where I belong and being able to give the man I love the most amazing and unique gift of all...me, all of me, no barriers, no hiding....I am able to be with him the person I am under the outside shell that the rest of the world normally sees.

signed his submissive owned

A new Baby....my Family is complete...for now

With respect to my Owner,

No better Christmas present than a baby!

As I write this our beautiful house is filled with the sounds of a small baby crying....yes finally tonight my Owner and I had our new addition a baby boy arrive....he was born 1:34pm pst on Sunday 5th December 2010 and his name is Legion...his is to join his older Siblings his twin brothers (our princes) Malin and Edson and his little sister (our little princess) Laci. All our children have names that mean something and Legion is no different his name means 'An important warrior' and is Old English and American.

Hard work over!

Legion was a water birth just like his older brothers and it was a beautiful moment between Daddy, the little one and Mummy....Dad was right by my side as I pushed our little bundle into the world and as a family we all are doing brilliantly.

Recovering together

So tonight as we settled in front of the fire to recover....the baby cooing as his siblings looked at him curiously and the dog guarding us all as he always does I couldn't help but realise how lucky I am to have such a young and beautiful family....for now my Owner and I are not having any more children....it is time he and I had time for each other and let the children grow up together.

This Christmas the house will be filled by sounds of laughter, squeals of delight, the discipline and grumbles of a happy and tired Father and Owner, a mountain of used wrapping paper and the smell of beautiful home made cooking prepared lovingly for her family by a happy and carefree Mother and owned submissive.....Will I moan when I spend boxing day clearing up? Hell No! This is how a family should be!

When the time is right to expand I am sure we will have another baby but for now we are happy, content and complete...we are a family of 6 plus a dog!

Signed his submissive owned

A Brilliant day!

Dressed to thrill and please

With respect to my Owner,

Some days are just good days, some are great days and some are brilliant days...for me today was one of the latter days...I had chance to sort myself out some new make-up and hair...Master and I had fun with each other and others....we went silks shopping and I have so many silks now I have no idea what to do with them all...oh hold on yes I do I get to wear them all...grins

We spent a lot of time with each other today until business (RL) called him away (marred only by a small incident involving a patient at the clinic that made me realise just how much he strives to protect me and made me feel so loved wanted and needed but also made me feel proud to have him as my owner) and after he left me and with a babysitter arriving to look after the kids and the dog I headed out to the Bordello looking gorgeous in a set of new silks and matching cloak...it wasn't busy to start with but over a small amount of time it started to fill up...and as time progressed lots of people I loved and cared about came into the Bordello....I spent the rest of the evening in the company of one in particular which was wonderful and it finally feels like everything is back on an even keel once again

Signed his submissive owned

Christmas approaches

With respect to my Owner,

How cute is this picture below? Here is me and the kids with Farshore Pup getting ready for Christmas and beside it the stockings over the fire place for us all....I just love this time of year and I can assure you that the kids will have to learn to love it to!

Signed his submissive owned

Delivering new life for Glint

With respect to my Owner,

So tonight was just like any other night until I walked into the Bordello....the first thing I heard was a scream of my name via the mouth of La Prez Cara and then in a blur I was finding myself beside Bree as I realised very quickly that she had gone into labour....suddenly things moved very quickly and getting all of us back to the clinic I began to take charge of the situation and finally peace and calm was in charge as I got Bree to concentrate on me and bring her 3 little kittens all girls arrive in the world....each one as beautiful as their Mom....Cara was in the water at her side and Nim and Dalton were there on hand to help us as we encouraged Bree to push with all her might...poor Cara her hand was hurting and her voice hoarse from counting backwards from 10 to help Bree with her timing.

The Birth was not complicated until the end when baby number 3 gave me a scare involving the cord being wrapped round it's neck but as all good midwives I was able to stay calm and work quick under pressure and Mom and babies are all doing well.

I love my job especially when I help to bring new life into Glint....it shows how the world is always moving on...it never stands still time doesn't and as Christmas approaches a time for loved ones friends and family to be to get together I realise just how lucky I am to be surrounded by all the important people in my life right here in Envision and Glint!

Signed his submissive owned

Yesterday

With respect to my Owner,

As one once more

Over the last few days my Owner and I have been exploring our relationship, he has been testing my submission and will continue to do so over the next few months as we learn more about one another and what it is that we both need together and from each other. With that testing comes time to unwind and be us also and what better way than to tease each other with sexual encounters with others.

Yesterday was indeed one of those time and as we both used different parts of the house to entertain our guests and each other we both enjoyed the need to satisfy each other's expectations....of course as with any time this happens the need to be with each other afterwards and claim one another back was as strong as ever. The bond that we share is unbreakable we both understand what it is that we have...we both know the strength we get from it.

So here is another picture this time taken by my Owner of the two of us joining as one once more, reconnecting with each other, strengthening the bond that we have as a couple and as Owner/owned

Signed his submissive owned

Our Weekend and going back to my roots

Going back to my roots

With respect to my Owner,

So we have been together on and off all weekend and it has been just perfect....its great when business for my Owner mixes well with our family life but more than that my Owner and I have been able to spend quality time exploring what we both like and meeting new people and as we both have had time to discuss events going on in our lives with both our busy schedules I have decided to go back to my roots to understand what it is that makes me the submissive Kajira that I am so I am back in silks again for the majority of the time and along with my cuffs and my slut belt and because there is snow on the ground at home in Envision and in DD I am wearing some Leather Kajira shoes. I am proudly showing off my Owned tattoo and my Kajira branding alongside my leg tattoo.

So over the next few weeks I want to learn all it is that makes me who I am and learn my role as a Kajira once more to obey my Owner to be his submissive....yes there will be times when I can't be in silks my Owner understands that but whenever possible I will be his Submissive Owned Kajira in every sense of the words...clothes don't make a person it's what's inside what their heart desires...being true to one's self is and the one's you love is what counts

Oh and below is a photo of my beloved home in snow...I love Christmas!

Signed his submissive owned

Dark Den in Snow....women can where shoes!

With respect to my Owner,

Christmas time in Glint...snow has fallen and a lovely tree stands by the entrance! My Owner and I went there this past week and saw the beautiful tree, we were surprised by the snow and more over surprised by La Prez as she lifted the footwear ban for women to save out toes from frostbite! I have to say it was nice of her to do so and visiting the place it looks quite different! Take a look for yourself

Signed his submissive owned

Quality time once more

In the Breeding Motel 1 year on!

With respect to my Owner,

Spending time with my Owner last night was a joy from start to finish....I do so love quality time with him and I am without a doubt a very lucky woman and as my submissive nature shines through and takes me on a voyage of discovery I am learning so much about how we fit together and why it works the way it does from images that we see, things that we both like and experiences we both share they prove that we are indeed on the same wave length. As a treat for our 1 year celebration we headed back to the Breeding Motel and shared a passionate encounter with each other that reminded us both of how it all began....smiles...we have come a long way since then and it only gets better with time!

Every single day we share together we learn something new about ourselves, each other of the path we are choosing or continue to develop something already started. Both hungry with need and desire for each other, both so incredibly good for one another.Yes this is a journey we share together and revel in as we increase our knowledge, discover ourselves and together choose what is right for us a couple....what I am learning about the whole M/s or D/s lifestyle is that no 2 couples are the same and not all rules or teachings suit everyone, there really is no right or wrong as long as it works then it's good and for us this is working and can only become more intense as time passes.

Signed his submissive owned

To all my American Friends and their loved ones

Happy Thanksgiving!

A year ago....

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin...

Let me tell you a story, a story about a woman who was unhappy and trapped in a loveless relationship, a story about a man who at the same time was half way across the world and in a marriage that also was suffering hardship. Through the Internet they met and became friends and together they enjoyed each others company, neither one of them looking for more than friendship and to fill empty voids in their lives. Together they grew close, they supported each other, made each other laugh, had fun, teased one another and fell in love. Fast forward to a year later and as the woman in our story types this entry in her blog she has a smile on her face and wears his collar around her neck a symbol of what she means to him as his Owned and how much he means to her as her Owner.

You see this is why I went with the Blog Title that I have, our worlds collided a year ago and to start with it really was us living in an internet fantasy world, a chance to get away from our mundane RL, away from the Relationships that restrained us and left us feeling empty, to have fun and reach out to other human beings and had we not met in the Breeding Motel Sim as we did it could be a whole different story now. But that's the best bit about our story, we did meet and we did get the chance to cross paths and now a year on our relationship is as solid as ever if not more so.

The last 12 months have flown by and in each others company we have both grown as people, we have made many friends and have been very lucky to experience things together that we may not have done with others. More than that though in that time he has become not only my best friend, my partner, my lover but also my Master/Owner which spans both our SL and RL. Our Commitment and love for once another is strong and shines through our RP with others and how we are when together be that in person or through technology. I never dreamt last year that I would travel half way across the world for 12 days to be with a man that I love and yet a few weeks ago I did exactly that.

Since I got back we have been making plans for the next 12 months and that too I know will fly by. As we take our Owner/owned relationship on a step further and learn more about what aspects of the M/s or D/s lifestyle that we like or wish to bring into our own relationship our lives will change even more. My Owner will have a tough few months ahead of him and I will be here to support him, to listen to him when he needs to talk and to sooth him as best I can from a distance and he knows that. Next November we will be together once more and who knows what plans we will have made and be making by then. All I do know is that I love him very much and that in his hands I walk tall, I feel loved, I am owned, he is able to control and command me as I submit to him (a part of my life that I was unable to fulfil before we met and more over hid from others as I lived a lie) and on top of that I have gained back so much self confidence for which I am truly grateful to him. 

So who says that SL and RL can't work together? My Owner and I are proof that it can, it does and will continue to do so, if you want something, if its right and its meant to be...it will work!

Spending Time with my sister Tara

With Tara

Tonight my sister Tara and I spent some time together which was brilliant fun we chatted about all sorts and had a good laugh. We chatted about events in our lives and we of course discussed our Master's in great detail. It was lovely to be able to share good news with each other and have a girly chat. Something that both of us have been unable to do for a while as we have both been busy. We need to do it more often, we need to go shopping together and we need to find some good stripper joints...chuckles

This week is an important week!

This week in America people celebrate Thanksgiving...a time for families to be together in each others company and give thanks for what they have, it is a harvest festival and as my Owner explained to me it is indeed bigger than Christmas.....of course here in the UK we celebrate Harvest differently in October and Christmas is the big Family event....anyway as it is important last week in our house on Envision I created a Thanksgiving area with signs and pumpkins and all sorts just to help my Owner feel in the mood and let him know how important he is to me and I think he was quite touched....after Thanksgiving I will place the Christmas tree there and make that my Christmas area!

However this morning that got me thinking that the Bordello in Dark Den needed a Thanksgiving feel to it so I have been to decorate that as well....not to much just a little bit and outside there is a basket with food and drink for people to help themselves to.....just my way of celebrating with them

Still this week is also important for another reason as far as my Owner and I are concerned...we celebrate a year of knowing one another....in a year we have both experienced so much and we both have so much more to seek and find....our relationship has changed on many levels over the last 12 months and I feel very lucky indeed....tomorrow 24th November is one year since we met that's 365 days and in that time I think hardly a day has passed where we have not been in contact somehow...from on SL to emails to instant message programmes and phone calls.....so tomorrow as we celebrate this milestone and look forward to the next I will thank my lucky stars that I have found my man and have indeed found myself....and as a new year in our relationship starts and we start to make more plans and move up a gear in our relationship I rest easy once more in the knowledge that my Owner will support me and command me as well as love me and as his submissive I return his love and strive to make him proud

Getting Better

OK so I haven't updated the blog with as much detail as normal as I have been suffering from a horrible nasty Cold that has quite literally knocked me sideways....although I have been in SL and have been trying to do my usual stuff I seem to have suffered from writers block....still at least I am now on the mend once more and hope that I will not suffer from any more this winter (honestly its been nasty and I am sure that my Owner will indeed confirm that he has been concerned) However as of this morning my writers block seems to have lifted and I am now free once more to continue as I was....smiles so blog entries coming up as always!

The Twins arrive...thanks to Auntie Selina

On Sunday I had a call from my little sister and the urgency in her voice was obvious...I asked her to calm down and finally I understood what it was she needed from me! Dropping what I was doing I raced home to Envision and to my clinic next door just in time for her and her partner to arrive. The pain on her face as she clasped her bump mixed with his continued pacing up and down on my brand new carpets confirmed as I expected that Lina was indeed in labour. Within minutes Lina and Gooz were surround by what can only be described as a gaggle of friends all will to be cheer leaders as the urged Lina to push....which at this stage she and I were not ready for.

After examining her I got Gooz to help her into the tub and as the contractions neared and strengthened amongst all the chaos in the room I got Lina to concentrate and push her twins into the world...one at a time they finally emerged first her little boy and then her little girl.

Lina and Gooz are now the proud parents of Leo and Jaenelle and as Auntie I am very proud to have had a hand in the birth.

Congratulations Mom and Dad and Happy Birthday Babies!

Spending time with Master Odin

Its been a funny old weekend what with Master being away on business and with me feeling a little under the weather but thanks to the wonder of technology (installing that expensive PC in our bedroom was the best thing we ever did and the desk is very comfy when it comes to having 'fun') we have been able to stay in contact....that said Master was able to make a surprise visit to see me this morning and it was lovely to have him with me for a while but all to soon business took him away again and left me in our big house with our children and the dog for company....of course I miss him when he is away work has been busy for him recently but I do so love it when he comes home with treats....my goodies cupboard is full of treats that I just can't get elsewhere so I always look forward to the gifts he brings from his travel and that reminds me I must ask him to bring back some chocolate my supply is a little on the low side!

Feeling under the weather

Today I get on to spend time with my Owner and we play with a friend of his Cosmic....nice gal enjoyed her company....however it would appear that I am going down with a cold or something and in the end my Owner sent me to bed....I tried for an hour to get comfy and sleep but struggling to breathe I ended up back on line with my Owner for a bit and then went to the DD to spend time in the Bordello which took my mind off how I was feeling but honestly if the posts for the next few days are sparse please excuse me my head is pounding and I can't think straight!

A great Friend

Tonight for the 1st time in ages I spoke to a great friend who I haven't seen much of or spoken to in a while...I have kept up with events involving him over recent weeks that have had me worried about him and a few weeks ago I spoke to him in the Bordello and thought his life may have changed onto a better path but its seems not to be and tonight while Master was on Business and I was busy doing some tidying in the house I received word from this friend and reached out to him...it was so nice to be able to chat to him and I listened to his problems as he listened to my talk making me think of days gone by when we used to spend a lot of time in each others company....right now he is indeed sad and my heart goes out to him...the cold lonely nights are not being kind to him right now and I hate that he feels so sad and lonely....however after a chat with me for a while he did find himself smiling once more and that lifted my heart...its hard to see friends down and lonely...I am hoping that now I will see more of him and that he knows I will be hear to listen to his troubles if he should need it...recent events have sent him away licking his wounds and he has been a shadow of his former self but now hopefully he will turn a brighter corner and be able to step out puff his chest out and walk proud and if I need to be there to help him I will...true friends are hard to come by!

The call of my 2nd Home

Tonight I had a chat with a couple of people and suddenly over a few short minutes I was struck with a realisation that what I need is to spend more time in Dark Den (DD)

DD has been my second home for so long but well due to a couple of issues Master and I left there to set up our home in Envision....I love our home it's big...its comfy...it has all we need for each other and to entertain others but sometimes when Master isn't around it can be lonely and I find myself in DD....when we moved out it was like a sigh of relief we could be us enjoy each other and of course we still do but when he is on business I find myself wanting to be surrounded by those people who made me feel so welcome when I first arrived in DD and of late Master and I have been in DD more to so it will be good for him to I think!

So like birds are called back to their nesting sites each year it appears that DD is calling me home when he is not around....so I am going to go back to spending more time in DD....right now V and I have the Bordello to keep us busy and with live Friday night entertainment and special events to plan and take part in not to mention Thanks Giving Christmas and New Year coming up I think it's time I stepped up to my Role once more...since our family got back off our trip I have been busy with household chores and such like and have not been in DD as much as I should so now I have every intention of getting on with things and when on rare occasions business is not calling Master in the week or at weekends (when all the hard work of the week has been done) I can retreat to paradise and relax with my Master...I think they call that the best of both worlds! So in this case I really can have my cake and eat it!

And Finally...more happy news!

La Prez has something to smile about....I have indeed been very worried about her over the last few weeks as both her pets were released from their collars and she seemed so down and yet today I hear good news that the return of a good friend Master Goldfire has indeed put a smile back on her face and a spring in her step....that can only be good for her and for them...they had a rough time of it way back and both need some happiness...so for now I can breathe easy once more that La Prez is happy and being looked after...wait till Master hears...he will indeed be very happy....he has spoken many times of hoping they would indeed be together once more!

More Wedding News!

OK so not only is the Prince getting married (see post below) but my Little Brother is too...awwww...I am very close to my brother always have been and I am very pleased for him...his Fiancée is lovely and they have been engaged a couple of years now however they only confirmed their Wedding Date yesterday and it is to be Friday 11th November 2011 (11/11/11- don't you just love magical dates like that?) at 1130am (should have been 1111am surely?)...this is also Armistice Day (Veteran's day) and I think it will be a wonderful day to hold such a family affair on and the Reception will be held the following day. If all goes to plan my Owner will be with me at my side at this very special Occasion.


My Sister did indeed get married last October (2009) and it was a wonderful day if not a little tense in places but it was a very good day, the weather held out and I am pleased to have such a lovely Brother-in-Law...now all I am waiting for is the patter of tiny feet from them...grins


I only have One Brother and One Sister (both younger than me) so to see them both grow up and settle down is something I cherish. I may not see 'eye to eye' with my little Sister (the Princess as I refer to her as) but as the eldest I do look out for them both....regardless of what may or may not have happened between us in the past...I am of course the black sheep in the family...I like to do things my own way and not conform as the others may do or as people believe I should do....that is my choice...life has been a little harder for me and now as I reflect on it I see myself in a much happier place because of one man....I would not change my life (well not all of it) as it has shaped me into the person I am and has allowed me to take paths that I may not have taken otherwise...for now I count my blessings and take each day as it comes (well I try to keep my feet on the ground)...who knows what the future holds for any of us.

Awwww...what lovely news!

The Happy Couple

Wearing Diana's Ring

OK so most of you know by now that I live in the UK....well today news was announced that Prince William and his Girlfriend (or should I say Fiancée) are to get married in 2011 either Spring or Summer...I am very happy for them...Prince William and Kate (Catherine) Middleton have been together for 9 years and make a wonderful couple and more over Prince William has given his love his Mother's Engagement Ring...I am sure that Princess Diana would indeed be proud of William for choosing a woman that like her was not of Royal decent....the engagement ring was a very nice touch...I wish them both well in their future marriage and hope that it is a long and happy one!

Time with my Master once more

So yesterday Master and I spent some time together...first we hugged and then I showed him some changes inside and outside the house...we went to Dark Den and visited some friends where we saw Master Goldfire and chatted with him for a while...for those of you who know Gold I can assure you that he was definitely a sight for sore eyes and of course I had to go to him for a Huggle....smiles....anyway after that we went exploring and then had contact from Sens who invited us to join her and some friends for a bit of Adult Fun...chuckles...it was fun indeed...smiles....then after that Master wanted teasing and we headed for the Keyhole Club which was great fun...all too soon though it was time for me to get some sleep being a busy working Mum of 3 with a clinic a photography business and a baby on the way can really take it out of you!

Lina's Baby Shower

So yesterday I had to lie to my little sister and try to convince her that no-one was throwing her a Baby Shower....god I am so not good at telling lies....anyway eventually the 'Father to be' Gooz sent me a directions to the baby shower and taking a gift from Master and I of a Twins Heart shape Cot and balloons I headed to the party...once everyone was there and all gifts were on display we waited for the Mom to be to arrive and finally after what seemed like ages she arrived looking lovely (being pregnant really suits her) and the fun began...before she arrived we all lined up and performed the Thriller Dance for her...all in a line to...she was made up! She ended up joining in with the dancing (and for a heavily pregnant woman she can move) and of course there were plenty of hugs all round....I can honestly say that she was very happy and I think her and Gooz will make wonderful parents just as Master and I do...I can not wait to meet their little ones...watch this space it won't be long and as midwife and Auntie can I just say I'll be having my cuddles once Mom and Dad do!

Time to get back to normal in the Farshore/Winterwolf Household

OK so I unpacked all the suitcases...did the washing....made sure the kids and Farshore Pup are fed and happy...Master had business to attend to and now all is back in order in the house....just another typical day then...grins....I have somewhere to be tonight....more news on that to follow tomorrow!

I have done some decorating in the house today well Thanksgiving is around the corner for Master and we have a yummy treat that I hope will make him laugh on the table in the lounge!

Yep all is as it should be once more....welcome home my family....now if I could just have this baby.....

Where did the Day go?

OK so some days life just passes by in a blur....take today for instance....I awake early (again) and head to work once ready....work is busy then quiet then busy then quiet and this goes on all day....you look at the clock and notice the time and look puzzled as you wonder where the morning went....lunch and then back to work and suddenly without warning you hear from the radio the unmistakable tones of the hourly Pips and looking at the clock as you once more gasp realising the day is almost over 1 hour to go.....god if only every day could be like this....grins

So as soon as I was able to get out I find myself on my doorstep...no idea how I got home...can hardly remember the walk except for stopping at the post office on the way....I know it was raining but for some reason I just cant remember walking it which means my mind was elsewhere or blank....now for anyone who knows me 'blank' is not how I would explain my mind....it is often busy...very busy....in fact it's what makes me wake up early every day without fail almost much to my annoyance, my Owner has pointed out (and rightly so I might add), I need to learn to sleep in so I can live longer...chuckles

So I get home drag the dog out for a walk....which annoyed him as he hates getting wet....I get back grab my tea and settle in front of the laptop and suddenly I realise that the day really has flown by.....it's not often that I take stock of my day but now as I sit here and catch up on other blogs as I type my own I realise that I must be settling back into my normal pattern once more and of course in a way that is good but in others it makes me realise that time really does fly by....fun or not

Being back in SL

So for the last 2 days as soon as I log in someone greets me and then waits for tales of the time I spent with my Owner...smiles....it's nice to be back in SL amongst friends and although I miss my Owner very much everyone is helping me to fill the void....smiles

I can see a few things have changed while I have been away including having to put our house right...no idea how or when the walls moved but with my builders hard hat on I set to work making the structure sound again for my family the last thing I want is one of the kids hurt or far worse than that....my Owner hurt.....so I have been making sure that the house is safe and makes a perfect home once more....well both Odin and I have taken pride and care in the place we call ours

Adjusting

So today is my last day off before I head back to work....slowly I am adjusting to being back....I am sure it will take a few days...smiles...and now I can get back into a normal routine and look at planning the next time My Owner and I can be back together

Home again

So here I am on my laptop updating you all once more my head still a little fuzzy from a mixture of feelings and thoughts...but I am home and as my Owner said to me last night...there is no place like home....as much as this may be true I can't help but miss him....still I am sure I speak for both of us when I say that we would not have it any other way right now....our time to be together will come

So there we have it....yes I had a wonderful time...yes I am proud to be his owned...yes I miss him....and yes I can't wait to be back in his arms...as we plan our next time together a smile crosses my lips!

Sadness and Happiness

So here I am once more 12 hours from my flight home....my mind racing of all the fun and pleasure I have had since I got here....Right now I am on my Owner's Laptop trying to put my thoughts into words....

I have had a wonderful time...no scrap that and make that an amazing time....I am more in love with my Owner now than I was before I joined him and you all know how much I loved him then....chuckles

However I can't stop the tears from welling up as I think of returning home....of leaving him....of being apart once more....knowing that it will probably be a whole year before we are back together again....365 days....wow seems such a long time to wait...and yet we managed the last 11 months and that flew by so the next 12 months will do to.....there will be many hurdles ahead of us....my Owner has some tough times ahead of him that I can only sit back and watch him go through supporting him from a distance when I really want to be by his side squeezing his hand and helping him

On November 24th we will have met each other 12 months ago.....1 whole year....in that time things for both of us have changed dramatically and I have learnt more about myself and who I am than I have ever done before....would I change anything?.....no....well apart from the obvious distance of course....we can't always have want we want in life and when you do find something that works....thats right....grab it with both hands....don't let things pass you by....don't play mind games with each other....enjoy what you have because life sometimes has a funny way of bringing people together when they need it the most and that's when you appreciate every single moment more

All that is important to me right now is that I enjoy my last day by his side showering him with my love as his Owned and look forward to our relationship growing ever closer over the next 12 months....with his collar around my neck its the one item that will keep me going even when things are tough...and after I leave tonight and set off on my journey my thoughts will be of him as I am sure my tears will flow then....knowing that the next time I hear his voice will be on the phone on his way home from work tomorrow night on a road I now know as we both settle into our normal every day pattern once again and on Thursday I to will return to work a different person...someone who has grown and is confident and happy basking in the love of a man who no matter how far away from me will be there always

At the weekend Odin and Winterwolf will be together once more side by side....that will bring the smile back to my face but for now its the RL that matters....its what we have together that is special

Finally My Owner,

I love you more than I could ever say and already I know how much I will miss you....but it won't be forever....just for a while....I am your Owned and always will be....and as I type this and fumble with the tassle on your collar my eyes full of tears I hope that we will always be this close and happy....and yes I am happy more than I ever thought possible....you have shown me what it's like to love again and be loved by a proper gentleman....from the soft gentle moments to the times we raw with laughter and from the bottom of my heart I can't tell you how much you mean to me there just isn't the words...I will be right by your side supporting you no matter how hard things get over the next 12 months.....but then I am sure that you already know that

Safe and Sound

Hello all sorry I haven't been in contact sooner its been a whirlwind 48 hours plus

First of all we are both fine...happy...enjoying each others company

Secondly adjusting time zones is harder than one might imagine lol

The journey was good...slight delay taking off but good all the same...of course as is often the case by the time i got here I had bad news from home that an uncle of mine had died...it was always going to be on thr cards but I felt so vulnerable hearing that so far away and yet my Owner was so good about it that within a couple of hours after we chatted about my Uncle I felt so much more secure

Its the little things like stolen kisses walking hand in hand sharring desserts...chuckles...that make this so incredibly amazing...there are certain things you just cant do on SL

The most amazing thing is the fact that I feel right at home here...being with him scared me a little before I set off on my journey on Thursday as the nerves kicked in and yet as soon as I saw him at the airport all my fears melted

I am lucky very lucky to have found a man who understands me who makes me feel so special and I in turn shower him with love respect trust and my want need and desire for him grows more with every passing minute

So for now as I sit here in the early morning knowing it's lunchtime back home I reflect on the past year with a smile...so many new friends...so much laughter and joy...finding the love of my life...I am truely blessed and not the same person I used to be...I walk tall...I feel confident...I know I can put my mind to anything I choose to do...so thank you all of you for being there for supporting me through good and bad times and long may it continue

Of course that said there is one further thank you....

My Owner...Thank you for coming into my life, for capturing my heart, for seeing and understanding the real me...you are a gentleman through and through and yet you know just how to control me...in your presence I grow stronger and wiser and know that by your side is where I belong....so thank you from the bottom of my heart my love...you have me...ever single part of me and I never want that to change x

Nothing could make me smile more

28th October 2010

I don't think I need to say any more except...I am on my way!

Tomorrow is almost here

So how do I sum up how I feel right now?

Well let me explain something...my Owner heard me babbling at 100mph last night on the phone after he finished work because I am on holiday and am so excited....it does not escape me how important and how huge this event is but the pure excitement of being with the man I love over shadows everything right now

In just a few short minutes I will be on another website checking in for my flight and tomorrow I make my journey to the airport and then take my flight which will lead me right into his arms...and trust me after 11 months of getting to know each other, making plans, spending time in each others company, flirting, laughing and teasing one another this very magical moment is only just over a day away and neither of us can wait! I call our time in SL the longest session of foreplay in history and that statement often has us laughing!

I am so pleased that we met on SL, that he came into my life and that we both had met at a time when our lives could cross and become one and now finally we get to be together although its only for a short time and every single second of it will be precious to us

I am honoured to be his Owned, I am honoured to have him as my Owner...the love we share is a bond that has gripped us both and held us close through hard times already and there are many more to face but we have come this far and tomorrow we take the next big step.....we link in a commitment that will join us as one forever and that thought makes my heart race, sends a shiver of pleasure down my spine, brings a smile to my face and makes me catch my breath.

Oh yes we are both fortunate and lucky to have each other!

Halloween Event

So this Friday at the PRG Bordello is an event to celebrate Halloween...I spent yesterday making Halloween Posters and put them up in the Bordello and at the entrance to Dark Den....Miss V was very impressed and so was Master when I showed him...the event is obviously a themed event and I hope lots of people pop into the Bordello it should be a good night!

Baby no news...as yet!

OK so our newest addition was due yesterday and no sign...with all the excitement at the Bordello on Friday and all the rushing around I have done this week you might have thought that baby may have wanted to make an appearance but in this case no!

Tonight at the Bordello

Wow what a night....finally I head to bed tired and exhausted its technically Saturday Morning and Master decided enough was enough for me as he lead me home and we snuggled up on our comfy bed just the 2 of us....smiles

The event at the Bordello went so well it was better than V and I could have hoped for the staff were there keeping every-one happy and the event which was rather short notice after only taking over last week went really well there was indeed a large crowd.

It has been a busy week helping to prepare for this and have it all up and running but I am very proud of what we have all achieved and as I drift off to sleep cuddled up safe and warm with a big dopey smile on my face I can't help but think how great life is right now!

OMG 1 week left

This morning I awoke with butterflies not through being nervous but through being extremely happy and excited....in just 7 days I get to be with my Owner...I get to be in his arms....I will receive my collars...and everything we have been planning and hoping for will click into place....a few months ago when I added the countdown clock to our house I thought it would never come round this quick and now suddenly the moment is upon us...suddenly the time has gone past so fast it almost feels like I blinked and missed it!

On Sunday my Owner and I will be reaching the milestone of 11 months since we met...11 months!...that time has gone so quick and has been so important full of fun and laughter mixed with tough times but a time for us to grow so close to understand each other and develop as a couple....my love for him is so strong my need and desire for him like none I have ever felt before and as we creep towards Thursday and our lives finally reach that happy entangled state, a bond to never be broken I can't help but smile and think how lucky I am to have him in my life.

Busy Busy Busy

My God running a business, being a midwife, having a family and being the PR Chief is hard work to juggle...but enjoyable and very rewarding...smiles

Today I have been designing belts I have created one with PR on it for my role and am in the process of doing one for V now as the Exec I also have one that I am creating for Security! Next are the dancers!

With just 8 days before Master, the Kids, Farshore the Pup and I take a well deserved break it appears that things are keeping me very busy indeed!

Spending quality time with my Owner

So tonight I got a welcome surprise....tonight my Owner got chance to spend some quality time with me which was fantastic and much welcomed and needed!

We visited a few places and spent time with one another we went into Dark Den for a bit so he could see my handwork and give his opinion on our Friday night event.

We had contact from La Prez of the PRG who was away on vacation and chatted with her about many things and we had time to tease and please each other....mmmm very enjoyable indeed!

PRG Bordello Sign

So I have been busy designing stuff for the last couple of days for the PRG Bordello...I have created the sign as per the left my own uniform which is a proto type and I am sure will change over the next few days which includes a variation of my Slut belt which V likes so much and also a poster explaining our first live event on Friday which is an event based around the whole sexual experience of Pain and Pleasure.

It should be a good event and I have high hopes for it...at short notice it may not be as successful as we hope but you need to start somewhere...I got my submission on the event into the DDI for all to read following my other entry relating to the change of management.

Miss V and her job offer

Miss V

So as if I wasn't busy enough...grins....yesterday I was approached by V and asked to help her with a business proposition....not one to turn anything down without proper consideration I went over to Dark Den to meet with her and she asked me to come to the Bordello....since the devastation that had hit Glint and the re-build of the Bordello V felt it was missing something and had taken it over as new management hoping that it would indeed rise like a Phoenix from the flames

So what did this have to do with me? I wondered...well she was getting round to that...she had an idea that to help the Bordello along there should indeed be a certain number of staff in various roles and as the Exec of the Bordello she needed people around her she could trust and who had the same passion as her to build this into something amazing and give something back to the PRG.

Roles she had in mind were:
Bar Staff
Dancers
Security

But there was one role in particular that she wanted to fill with someone who was good with their words, great at taking pictures and had a good business head...that role was of the Press Relations Chief and she had one person in mind for that role....me

Now I was shocked and pleased that she had thought of me and tripped over my own words as I expressed how excited I was....I think I surprised her when I hugged her with sheer joy.

So there we have it...I am now the Press Relations Chief for the PRG Bordello as it has been named or as I nic name it....V's place

Delights

OK so here I find myself writing about something special...something that is so easy to put into words and yet so hard at the same time....it all started a few weeks ago and has developed over time into something very special...I don't want to give to much away as I want to keep a lot of it secret right now but I will say this....

Master and I found a kindred spirit yesterday....some-one who's qualities match our own some-one who is interested in having fun and pleasure and knows how to please. Yesterday we experienced major highs together as we climbed a ladder of ecstasy that gave us all fulfilment....the meeting of minds was a real earth shattering experience that left us all breathless and wanting more and Master enjoyed not only watching us 2 together but joining in too.

I want to shout from the roof top what happened but actually I quite like keeping this a secret right now developing it further and seeing where it takes us not that this is a bad secret in any way but I like the whole idea of keeping this between just us right now and enjoying the moment and I am sure that some will know who the other person is or guess over time but right now I am not saying names just that the person concerned can come back for more any time they like...and I truly hope that they do!

Lacey II

OK so yesterday had some surprising results...I mean really surprising!

Firstly Master and I spent all day together which was brilliant we did some sight seeing and eventually ended up at Dark Den to practise some shooting on the range which was great fun and much needed...the competitive side comes out when we do that and we were laughing all the way through it....then we saw Lacey who was cleaning Master Marvin's boat Lacey II and we chatted with her for a while as Master teased her about cleaning the Brass....while we were chatting 2 other friends V and Tami came to join us and we all headed into the boat for a drink and chat.

The last time I was on the boat was for the party to celebrate Master Marvin and Lacey's Partnership which was just after New Year and I mentioned this to Lacey as we stood by the bar and discussed the possibility of an anniversary party...Yay!

At this point Master did his best Tom Cruise impression behind the bar and poured us all drinks and then we all sat around and chatted on the boat. It was so nice just kicking back with friends and having a laugh...we talked about Tattoos and V and I compared ours and we discussed the up coming baby for Tami who is enjoying her pregnancy.

Lacey took us for a tour of the boat and that boat is beautiful Master Marvin and Lacey are very lucky...of course with Master having sea legs I may have to fight him on getting his own boat....grins...I am not sure our small bit of coast is big enough for that!

Anyway Lacey had to leave us as Master Marvin was due to arrive home from Business in the Hague any time soon and she still had chores to finish but she insisted that we all stayed and enjoyed ourselves so all 4 of us hit the hot tub and enjoyed some fun...Oh yes it was a great afternoon...little did Master and I know at that point that more fun was yet to come!

Tape Napper makes contact!

Deciding that after all the excitement of the morning so far and with Master asleep as it had been a heavy week for him, the kids playing with each other and the dog bless him, that I would go work on some images in the studio so checking the weather and seeing the sun shinning I open the door and take a deep breath as I feel the warmth of the autumn sun and head out through the garden the sounds of the birds singing and the water ringing in my ears

So I stepped into the studio and found a parcel had been delivered addressed to the business....I opened it and inside was a small tape....Raising an eyebrow I wondered want on earth was on it....I thought for a moment and realised that Master has a tape player on the study shelves so I started the short walk next door to our house slipping past the kids playing quietly putting a finger to my lips to keep the dog from making a sound and climbed the stairs to the bedroom where Master was sleeping soundly.

Tip toeing across the floor to his shelves I removed the tape player and climbed the second set of stairs to the attic and knelt on my slave cushion curiosity making my heart pound and making my breath catch in my throat...sliding the small tape in the machine I pressed the play button and listened to the unfamiliar voice my head telling me this voice was a disguise the words sending shivers of excitement through my body as I replayed it making sure I had heard correctly my heart racing faster at the thoughts that were swimming in my head....taking a deep breath I raced down to the bedroom shouting to Master as I went and jumping on the bed my slave training out the window as I begged him to listen and rewinding the recording once more I hit the play button for him to hear

His own eyes shinning as he realised that this was indeed communication from the tape napping incident a few weeks before and as I knelt on the bed my eyes glued to his face my hands holding the little machine shaking I waited for his reply....the tape recording listed demands and stated that our Tape napper was a private person, they mentioned that there were indeed several copies of the recording available and hidden across Glint....my head was all jumbled up knowing that others may indeed stumble upon this footage.

Waiting patiently as the information sunk into Master's fuzzy head from his deep sleep that I had rudely awaken him from I wondered what his next plan of action was to be!

Vacation time

So Master Odin and I have decided to take the children away for a holiday once the baby is born and all have a relaxing time we will be away for just over a week so I have been busy packing suitcases and backpacks so that we are all ready for the off...with the baby due next weekend I think we will be away by the following weekend giving us time to bond with the new arrival and giving the children and of course our well behaved Pup a holiday to remember...I have to say I am really looking forward to the break and I know Master is to!

My Beloved Sis

Tara and Pry

Today I went to see my beloved Sis Tara and her Husband Pry in their new home it is beautiful and while I was there I met another member from the Island Auriane and it was nice to see Tara in full flow moaning about the slaves she is working to train....chuckles

While I was there Pry arrived also and it was nice to see him as well it has been a while...smiles

Tara is due to give Birth soon and expand her family once more and she looks great...no matter what she says....smiles

We got talking about the Feast she is arranging to celebrate Samhain which is the is a Gaelic festival held on October 31–November 1. The name Samhain is derived from Old Irish and means roughly "summer's end" - it's basically a Harvest Festival and reminded her of home

I do miss having her around all the time and spending time with my sister was a joy....smiles

Our Babies are growing up!

Malin Laci Edson & Farshore Pup

Wow aren't our babies growing up? I took this after I dressed little Laci in a new outfit her hair is so cute and I hope that in the future it will go the same deep red as mine but for now its so gorgeous that colour....the boys are just adorable and Farshore Pup is loved by them all...soon there will be a further addition to this little close lovable group and all 3 of them are so excited! Their Dad and I are really proud of them all they are growing up fast and are a credit to us!